Army Men

 

by Joshua Spiro

 

            She played with army men and the neighbors gave her looks.  In the stairwells of her apartment, she would drop the green figures shrink wrapped in their thin plastic parachutes inside her perspiring fist, down the space between the banisters; then she would race down all six flights of stairs, always hoping gravity might grow lethargic or magnanimous and huff down after her, or smile, so she knew she'd been allowed to win. 

            She emptied the rounds of her feet echoing on the black and pink tiles into the nearby apartments, and the old bachelor in 5B hummed along.  In keeping with his life, though, he hummed alone, and the only reason the remainder of the building restrained their fury was because of her grandfather.  It was common knowledge, as these things are in small communities, that Lester Gruber had become very ill very suddenly.

            There were very few children in the building, as though they were implicitly forbidden by the stern sign riveted to the face of 28 Arbor Avenue that read: "No Pets Allowed."  The sixth floor was home to only that strange Meagan girl and Steven Mitsmucker, a round boy who kept two wads of bubble gum in his cheeks and to himself.  "I guess it's to be expected," the neighbors muttered.  "The mother's an art dealer, the father, a writer and teacher of high school English."  "When she opens her mouth, I just think how bad it'll be once she starts school."           

            Paul and Victoria Gruber worked the two halves of the day with the tenderness and synchronization of honeymooners sharing a tropical fruit.  Each took care of Meagan while the other was gone, and in the instances when circumstance lured them both away Mr. 5B would gladly babysit, though he just continued with his routine as if he were at home across the hall and one floor down.  It was during these hours when the old man transplanted his reading and stretching punctuated by staring contests with empty space to her apartment that Meagan could fill the halls like a one girl army of ants.

            Now, for instance, she was a millipede, chomping on imaginary tumble weeds she came across, stomping her many feet and clicking her teeth around empty air.  The tumble weeds tasted like spherical pretzels.  The millipede stopped in front of Steven's door.  She hesitated and began to hop up and down trying to pound the door with both arms and legs at once.  In a few moments Steven opened the door wide, like a man who lived in a crocodile's mouth.  He kept his hand on the knob.

            "What do you want?" he said without hostility or interest.

            Meagan bulged her eyes in her best insect fashion and said, "Would you like to be a spider?  They don't have as many legs, but they have extra eyes."

            "Huh?" It was a word his mother was trying to break him of. 

            "What I mean is, you need two people to pretend really well and I'm already a millipede."

            "Nah, I don't wanna be a spider.  I wanna watch TV.  My mom says next year I'm going to be in a kinder-garden so I'm watching all I can now."

            "Okay," Meagan nodded solemnly.

            She never understood why Steven didn't want to play games with her.  She didn't sit in chairs long enough for the backs of her legs to stick to them but they were each in their own sort of hurry.  Left without willing participants in her play, she would incorporate anyone who crossed her path.  If the Petersons jumped back when she dashed into the elevator, it was because she had the plague.  She wouldn't visit her Grandpa that day for fear of contaminating him.

            Breathing on people was a no-no, and she had to move fast, though she always did, because germs were mucky and poky.  To be left behind.

            Meagan turned away from Steven's closing door and promptly crushed a green plastic man beneath her feet.  A personal space worth of plastic held his feet together and kept him standing.  She loved when she misplaced toys because she got to find them all over again.  Dad said the super called it, "a lawsuit waiting to happen."

            Today the army man would be named Cal.  Toys' names changed to fit her mood, but they showed no signs of confusion.  Sometimes the army men became army women.  Cal and Meagan.  Meg.  Together, they had a lawsuit to fight.  It was out there somewhere, tiptoeing about on its cuffs, biding its time. 

            "We should tell Grandpa, Cal."  "He'll believe us if anyone will."  Cal was silent, but from the look on his face she saw his determination and his obedience to his commanding officer.  General Meagan Emelia Gruber.  "Double time men.  Cal, I can't run this whole army myself."

            Her grandpa had always lived in the apartment that adjoined hers.  Until he started staying in bed all the time he had taken his meals with them at his kitchen table.  He would prepare simple dishes he took from a battered red All Purpose Cookbook.  He had worked for the city newspaper, loading bundles on and off the truck.  After he returned from being drafted late in the war, he took a management position with the paper.  Now he had no energy but he was able to eat regular food.  He couldn't take pride in putting food on the table now, so he comforted himself with each IV drip he didn't need.  The aide only came once a week.

            Marching with wide overconfident strides, the General and company trekked through her apartment to her grandpa's.  Passing through the living room, she saw Mr. 5B reading a thick green book with yellowing pages; Meagan would have tried to sound out the title without the presence of more pressing matters.  They set up a cross-legged camp on the chest at the foot of his bed.  His eyes rolled open like pillbugs.

            "Grandpa, there's a lawsuit on the loose."

            "Is there now?" said Lester, sounding sleepy.

            "Cal and me are gonna fight it with our army but we wanted to warn you first."

            "Well what's it look like, so I can keep my eyes peeled?"

            "It has black pants and a black jacket and a tie covered with flames."

            "Real flames or a design?"

            "It's just a picture, silly," she said, puckering her lips to a light red asterisk and shaking her head.

            "Meagan, are you in here?" her mother called from the door between the apartments.  Only her head stuck in and she looked like somebody's mounted hunting trophy.

            "I have to go." she said.  "Don't tell Mom."

            "Oh I won't," he assured her.  He maintained his upright posture until she scampered away.  Only then did he slouch back into the pillows.

            "I just got home and I want you to try on a pair of overalls, honey."  "They're in your room," she added, making it clear that these overalls urgently needed a pair of five year old legs in them.

            In her room, Meagan groaned at the sight of the overalls.  They were purple corduroy.  She dutifully slid into them with her back on the bed and her legs wiggling in the air.  Ignoring the straps, she lay stiffly on the bed, pretending that this was her funeral and she was being buried in horrible clothes.  But the corpse in the dark purple cords got tired of seeing who'd come to say good-bye and her eyelids began to sink.  She dreamed.

            She dreamed she was standing at the world's tallest point.  The wind was blowing lightly and she could see nothing around for miles.  Then Meagan felt a tugging at her arms and heard two noises, each like the sound of a yogurt container opening.  She had a fur-covered flap of dark brown skin stretching between both of her elbows and hips.  She stepped to the edge of the world's highest point and leaned over it until she was all lean. 

            Gliding was nice.  She could make out her starting point now, as the wind spun her in circles.  She had been standing on her grandfather's forehead.  Around and around she went trying to catch a glimpse of the expression on his face.  Failing this she tried to drift back to his chin and climb on, but the winds pushed her back as if an adult held her at bay by the top of her head. 

            Suddenly, a smaller version of Steven appeared on her wings.  He was hopping up and down on a red bouncy ball, giggling, then looking solemn, then giggling again.  The bottom of the ball had a spike which poked a little hole in her wing with each bounce.  They were adding up. 

            It was no longer a glide but a plummet.  She passed her grandfather's shirt pocket and Mr. 5B was tucked inside.  He waved to her, and as she fell past he started to whistle and the sound spiraled down after her like a maple pod. 

            She could make out shapes on the ground now.  Faster. The wind in her ears, a yawn turned up full blast.  There were her neighbors.  The Petersons, the Brinkleys, everyone.  Her parents were in the middle, holding hands.  The neighbors tugged at her mother and father's sides until they stretched out to catch her.  She hit them and felt them sag towards the ground.  She was not slowing down enough she would be a pancake.  Instead, they sent her back into the sky, half as high as before.  This time though, her grandfather was a sequoia tree with no bark.

            "What have you been doing all day?" Meagan's mother shook her.  "You shouldn't be falling asleep in the afternoon."

            "Cause when I take a nap, I can't sleep in the night?" Meagan was becoming more alert.

            "Right, exactly right."  "But you know what, your father and I were going to watch "Auntie Mame"  tonight, and you can stay downstairs and watch too if you go to bed when you get tired."  "Now run along and play while I make dinner." 

            "Thanks Mom."  Meagan headed into the hallway and stopped.  She saw another soldier lying on the ground next to his own arm.  "Come," she told him "we'll fix you up as good as new."

 

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